Am I a Feminist?
When we were discussing my choice not to attend the women’s march, my son said to me, “Mom, you’re the womaniest woman that ever womaned!” What did he mean by this?
I have asked myself, “Am I a feminist.?” Just as my mother, my sisters, and my nieces, and all of the women in my family, I am a strong and powerful woman. I am intimately acquainted with male power abuses and their consequences. Still, I hesitate to align myself with the feminist movement. Why is that? Many people who identify as feminist today are under aware of what I consider the true power of women. Although I have tremendous respect for women in the trades, and would never want to undo the great strides of feminism which have allowed women to chose from a variety of careers, my position is that the maximum expression of my power as a woman lies not in doing what men can do as well as they can do it, but in doing what only women can do, as well as I can do it.
I have never felt so powerful as when I delivered my daughter, in my living room, naturally and without medication. The doctors told me that I could not do that because it was a vaginal birth after cesarian; because my medical records from my son’s prior birth had the wrong date (off by six months), and failed to mention the grapefruit-sized dermoid tumor removed from my body at his birth; and because I was 38 years old. They were wrong. There is pressure to birth in hospitals because of the profits made by institutional control over the birthing process. Perhaps controlling the birthing process is about profits. It could be more sinister than that. But I digress.
I could build bridges and cars if I wanted to. I could manage boardrooms and cubicles. I could hunt and kill and skin animals, and I know that I could do these things. I don’t have to prove this to anyone. None of this would be the maximum expression of my true power as a woman. For me to relax into trusting the biology of my body and allow it to open to deliver my daughter is to be in my pure power. No man could ever do this, and it is the most important job to humanity. When women do what we can to relax and nourish our unborn children, when we choose sex only with men worthy of reproducing, men committed to being fathers, we are practicing exponential influence. We are choosing the contents of the future. If feminism highlighted and expressed this value, I’d identify as a feminist. However, it doesn’t. Feminism claims that the maximum expression of a woman’s power is exactly the opposite of this: the right to end the life of an unborn child. Furthermore, it fights tooth and nail for this right. Though they will say this is about rape and incest, it is not. The numbers prove it. Few will admit it, but it is clear that the primary reason for this is to recoil from the responsibility of being intentional about sex. This is not an expression of female power, but an abdication of it.
It is my security in my power as a woman that has me able to uplift and uphold men in their manhood. What is missing in the world today is not women being able to occupy male spaces, but women rebuilding the fabric of women’s spaces; including repairing the relationships among women and extended families, so that the home and family (as a cooperative, multi-generational endeavor) may again take precedence. It is then that man can step back into his role as honored protector of and provider for the sacred home and family. Again, anyone may diverge from these roles, and there’s nothing wrong with that. There will always be biological proclivities and divergence from them. This is the victory of feminism: choice. Choice is why we are Americans and why we are a great nation, admired by the world. (Although our country has and continues to commit grave power abuses and at great cost, the American values of personhood and free speech are still the maximum expression of human freedom embodied in the constitution, and our only footing for opposing the ruling elite. These values also happen to be the foundation for the concept of consent. It is when we restore the integrity of what has been stolen and unite in creative opposition that America will really thrive.)
If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot last.Mark 3:24-25, 27
And if a household is divided against itself, that household can never last…
But no one can make his way into a strong man’s house and plunder his property unless he has first tied up the strong man. Only then can he plunder his house.
Insecurity always seeks to demote the other. When we are secure, strong, and happy, we seek for others to also be those things. Now, I’m not one to fear monger and spread “conspiracy theories,” but what we fail to realize is that for a thing to be a conspiracy, it must be hidden. There is little about the global political and financial alliances that is hidden, unless you live under a rock. If we suspend our finger-pointing, and just consider logically for a moment the question, when there is a radical breakdown in the natural alliance of men and women (“a household divided against itself,”) is there something for the power elites to gain by that? It seems to me that there is. What would an intact, undivided family do? A family that upholds female and male power, and unites both expressions for the best possible outcome for children—what would this sort of family do? I’ll tell you. First, it would assess the current situation, get related with what’s so. It would face the fact that the food and water and air are substandard (understatement) and begin to address that issue. This family would start by creating clean soil and gardens. It would harness the energy of the family to the end of creating a healthy environment for it to thrive. It would then look out to the block, the village, the town, the city, and beyond, in that order. This is what the man would see to, guided by the woman, who is intimately connected with the needs of the child. He would serve not the system, but his wife. She would, in turn, serve him, and the two, united, would form the most powerful opposition to any nefarious forces at work in the world.
All of this said, in an age where thinking is heavily impacted by media, which tends to be controlled by a few families, families who have for a very long time exerted undue influence over human systems and structures, for their own profit, the only responsible thing to do is to ask ourselves this question: in whose interest is it that I allow the house of my mind (hearth, family, community) to be divided by the soundbites that I consume and to which I react? We must consider the logical position that we are being manipulated en masse at the level of thought, through the media we consume and spread. I urge you to consider this carefully. The action to take is clear. Stop consuming and spreading media that makes you feel outraged (divides your house). Assess your situation. How are the children? What actions can you take to build up the people around you? Being a victim, being outraged, and being a rescuer all cause the production of addicting stress hormones in your body. Calm down. Tune in. Turn it off.